Is this punishment, is this torment, or does this give me an obvious reason that I won't be having the future that everyone wanted for me? Too busy distracting myself, too busy covering up, too busy trying to be someone I'm not, telling myself that I can't find another way out. I know my mistakes, I know who I am. I'm intelligent when it comes to things that involve myself, but allow myself to be close-minded from things that other people find disturbing.
They're obviously lost, they can't fucking take care of themselves, yet I allow them to run my life in fear. So much to lose from one simple mistake, and no, neither family nor friends will abstain from obstinacy. If my reasons for this reflection I'm writing today, is portraying what I'm trying to hide you better fucking keep it to yourself and let it be a secret. People don't learn when they don't talk about it to people directly. Please learn to listen, just not to me, but also to others.
We're given this short life to change, and to make peace... Whether there is an afterlife or no afterlife we better make our lives fulfilling just not for ourselves but for others too. Spread the love, learn from the pain. Pity the obstinate, appreciate the savant... This may be vague, but I know few people will know what I'm talking about.